Nakakainis

ang layo na nga natin sa isa't isa ganyan ka pa. hayz :/

killing myself to sleep

tonight, I never feel incomplete like this before. :(

I never know what will I do to move on from this feeling of loneliness tonight. Sometimes, I really wish you will be at my side, comfort me and let me realize that its just another ordinary day. It's hard to pretend that Im ok, when I know inside of me, there's something missing.

what I wanted was you just have to make me feel I was still a part of your everyday routine, no matter how far we are apart. I know Im beginning to be selfish for us, but I dont understand why I feel so alone lately. I cant put my mind at ease, I feel so bad.

I know I need to conclude this day of my life at the least and I pray tomorrow will be different.

I wish that sometimes you drop a goodnight kiss for me before ending your day. :(

Random music!

night is young and the musics high
our roads are gonna cross again
i make my journey through eternity
in the sun i feel as one in the sun
i'm standing here until you make me move
at least i found out what it takes to be strong
i’m just out to find the better part of me
because tomorrow might be good for something
laughing about the way they want him to be
now it looks as though they`re here to stay
you came along and then the sun did shine
how much longer will it take to cure this
just to cure it cause i can't ignore it if it's love
so i looked up in the sky and i'm thinking why o why
you will think my love was really something good
when i'm all alone with the stars above
you can save me from the man i've become
so i say it in a breath hope my dreams will take me there
i've finally found my way to lead me down this lonely road
just close your eyes each loving day i know this feeling wont go away

Nothing much more happened today

Aside from going to work, spending a lot of time staring at the computer thinking what to do first for the week, all I did was to find an inspiration for the day.

Which I failed.

Im waiting for something that, I know, will be a little impossible to happen.

---

Four strong winds that blow lonely,
Seven seas that run high,
All those things that don't change, Come what may.

Ako Man Ay Kulang

Ako Man Ay Kulang
(2011.08.03)

ala Lilian Smith

Ang paghahanap

sa sulok ng mga hula at katotohanan;
sa maselang katayuan ng bukas sa pangarap;
sa kung saan napaghahalo ng sining ang pantasya at makasanglibutang bagay;
sa sandaling naging kahapon ang pananalig sa karunungan ng bukas;
sa pagbaba sa kapangyarihan alang alang sa karamihan;
sa pagliglig sa luma't mapait na karanasan at pagyukod naman sa pagbabago;
sa tugon sa mga tanong na kailan man hindi masasagot;
at sa taimtim na pagyakap sa walang katukuyan;
pati na ang di-buong kaalaman natin sa Maykapal

ay ang laong laan ng bawat isa,
sa aking palagay.

-Stephen Tequila

Hello World!

I'll be back here in this sphere!

Back from Hiatus... hopefully

After many moons of ups and downs in my life, hopefully, I can find some time again to post here.

I missed this time of my life where my only reason to stay or be online is to blog.. yep.. blog my heart out. I drafted so many post here in the past 2 years. I cant just click the publish button because, the feelings when I writing those drafts were gone.

alone again naturally

I happen to find myself on a bus going to a distant land. When I arrived, I find everything is different around me except for one thing.

Im alone.

Here I am again, decided to walk along the remaining distance used to be another ride by a jeep. Nothing is new. I think, I will just walk off and then all the sadness in my heart will be gone. But that wouldn't work. Im still alone.

I never thought I will be like this again, longing for someone I never thought I will care for. Am I being missed too? Ouch, I said before I will never fall in love again. But then my heart starts beating again. Am I hopeless already?

After I did my business in this far away land, many things came to my mind. But when summarized, I hope it will be me and you in the end.

----------
I miss being missed dearly. :(

parang may kulang

matagal na rin palang walang bagong post dito. pano ba naman, masyado maraming gustong gawin sa buhay...

hayz. nakakapagod ang isang araw kapag pakiramdam mo may kulang. dumaan ang maghapon, nagawa ang dapat gawin para mabuhay,.. kumain, matulog, tumulong sa bahay, tumambay, etc., pero may kulang.

nakakainis isipin, kung minsan may kasama ka pero hindi mo alam kung kasama ka nga nya.
kung minsan nakakalunos isipin na wala kang magagawang anuman sa isang bagay na tila nakatakda na sa hinaharap. ngunit mapangyayaring maiba kung may makakasama ka.

sana makilala mo ako bilang isang kasama mo.

You dont realize how much...

I need you.

I dont really know why Im feeling so afraid and so weak this day. Its like wanting to see into the wind and feeling its teeth. :(

I saw birds fly and glide with the wind this morning, I found it enchanting though incomplete. As when strong winds came, they scattered.

I hope if we fly and turn against the air, you are with me even if its means landing backwards.

because I realize how much...

I need you.

-------------

Im going to find my girl, gonna hold her tight.
I will make it right, just need her say alright.
I will ring bells so to make us remember
That Im her boy and she's my girl.